What the #$@*! was I Thinking?!

Have you ever had a "What was I thinking moment?" You know that feeling when you completely lose it? Maybe you snapped at someone over something small or froze in a situation where you needed to act fast. Yeah, the truth is that you weren't thinking. Your brain was hijacked!

This little almond-shaped part of your brain called the amygdala is like an overprotective bodyguard. The problem? It hits the panic button way too fast, leaving your logical brain in the dust. But here’s the good news—you can actually learn to override that response and stay cool under pressure.

What is the Amygdala Hijack?

The brain has two minds -  one that thinks and one that feels. Think "upstairs/downstairs." The downstairs brain is in charge of survival.  The upstairs part of the brain is in charge of rational thought. This is where the prefrontal cortex is and that’s the part of the brain that handles executive functions like planning, goal setting and insight.

The limbic system sits right in the middle, and that is where the amygdala is located. The amygdala is the emotional sentinel and it has a lot of power. Any strong emotion, anxiety, anger, fear, or betrayal trips off the amygdala and initiates a rush of stress hormones floods the body before the prefrontal cortex can respond. That is the amygdala hijack in action.

The term was coined by Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence, and it describes what happens when your amygdala (the part of your brain responsible for processing emotions like fear and anger) takes over.

When a threat—real or perceived—hits your radar, your amygdala sends a distress signal to your hypothalamus, kicking your body into fight, flight, or freeze mode. Adrenaline surges, your heart races, and your thinking brain takes a back seat. Your body is basically responding to the brain screaming, “Danger!” when there’s no actual danger.

Neuroscientists have found an inverse relationship between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex. When the amygdala is active with blood and oxygen, there is less activation in the prefrontal cortex. It’s like when we are really stressed or angry or upset, the brain sends all the fuel downstairs to the feeling brain rather than upstairs to the thinking brain. It’s kind of like losing 10 to 15 IQ points temporarily, which explains “what was I thinking?”

Our neural priorities are (1) to survive, (2) to feel, and (3) to think. Because your brain is wired for survival, the amygdala has a lot of power. Its job is to protect you from danger. But it's actually pretty terrible at differentiating between an actual life-or-death situation and, say, a difficult conversation with your boss. So, it reacts fast—often impulsively —before your logical brain (the prefrontal cortex) even has a chance to weigh in.

The brain's neural priorities follow the progression of development.

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How to Stop an Amygdala Hijack in Its Tracks

The key to beating an amygdala hijack is learning how to interrupt the process before it spirals out of control. Here are a few science based ways to do that:

Take a Breath

When your body is in fight-or-flight mode, your breathing goes shallow. Deep, intentional breathing signals to your brain that you’re safe, activating your parasympathetic nervous system (the one that calms you down).

Try the Box Breathing Method:

• Inhale for 4 seconds.

• Hold for 4 seconds.

• Exhale for 4 seconds.

• Repeat until you feel the tension ease.

This simple hack gives your brain enough time to switch gears and stop the hijack before it goes too far.

Name It to Tame It

Science shows that naming your emotions can reduce their intensity. When you’re hijacked, try saying (even silently), “I’m feeling angry” or “I’m overwhelmed.” This taps into your prefrontal cortex and shifts the power away from your amygdala.

Naming it = calming it. Simple, but incredibly effective.

Engage Your Logical Brain

When the amygdala hijacks your brain, it overrides logic. To counter this, ask yourself:

• “Is this really a threat?”

• “What’s the worst that could happen?”

• “What’s the best response I can give right now?”

These questions activate the prefrontal cortex, bringing you back to logical thinking instead of emotional reacting.

Use the 6-Second Rule

When your amygdala hijacks your brain, it reacts instantly—flooding your system with stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. But here’s the cool part: these stress chemicals take about 6 seconds to fully course through your body. If you can pause and ride out those 6 seconds without reacting emotionally, you give your prefrontal cortex (your rational, thinking brain) enough time to regain control.

• Take a deep breath

• Count to six

• Mentally label what you’re feeling

This brief pause interrupts the hijack, giving your brain a chance to shift from emotional reactivity to logical thinking. It’s a simple but powerful hack that helps you respond thoughtfully instead of reacting impulsively.

Practice Mindfulness and Grounding

Mindfulness isn’t just a buzzword—it’s a game-changer when it comes to preventing emotional hijacks. Grounding techniques, like focusing on your senses (what you see, hear, or feel), can anchor you in the present and stop your brain from spiraling.

Try This Grounding Trick:

• Name 5 things you can see.

• Name 4 things you can touch.

• Name 3 things you can hear.

• Name 2 things you can smell.

• Name 1 thing you can taste.

This simple exercise shifts your brain out of panic mode and back into the present.

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If you’re serious about rewiring your brain and staying calm under pressure, consistency is key. Thanks to neuroplasticity (your brain’s ability to rewire itself), the more you practice these techniques, the stronger your rational brain becomes. Over time, you’ll be able to react less emotionally and make smarter decisions under stress.

Mastering the amygdala hijack isn’t just about avoiding emotional outbursts—it’s about taking back control of your mind and responses. The more you practice, the easier it becomes to stay cool, calm, and collected—even when life throws curveballs your way.

💡 Got a Story? Ever been hijacked by your emotions? What helped you stay cool? Drop a comment below! I’d love to hear your experiences and strategies.

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